Goals

Goals are one of our most fragile, useful, illusions. Although they may help focus our activities, they are subject to constant change and apt to be overruled any instant by some contradictory pursuit. Not to mention modified or severely disrupted by changes in environmental reality .

But, as noted, they are useful anyway. I like to work at making my art better – although exactly what that means is tenuous. Draw more accurately? Accent a personal style? Create something beautiful? Yes, well, okay …

There is usually a question of trade-offs – enjoy that donut or continue the diet? More seriously, how willing should we be to direct all our energies towards a relatively exclusive vision. Trying to be the “best” at something, if done to exclusion, may “work” but leave us damaged or unable to do much else .

I’ve learned to accept reevaluation of goals as a normal part of consciousness. No doubt aided by being older, when it is only prudent to find time scale shrinking and capabilities more limited. I no longer try to run fast, nor to walk 15 or so miles. I do adjust to walking “briskly” on hills, and I’m satisfied if I do a few miles or so .

Thus also with my artwork. And, honestly, an awful lot of my daily moments. Sad, I suppose, from the goal orientation of youth. Which has faded, as all illusions do .

AI and Pride

Perhaps we have all turned into John Henry, pounding railroad spikes trying to beat a machine. Artists are confronted with the same situation as other intellectual occupations – what used to take skill, pride, thought, and time can now be done by any teenager in a dull moment. The internet is flooded with AI images, movies, stories. Work has similarly vanished. Some of us remain luddites, stubbornly sticking to brush and pencil. Why? A waste of time…

But is it ?

Climbing a mountain or hiking in a forest is not the same as viewing a YouTube video of the adventure (not even – as technology advances – an IMAX immersion). Things we do for ourselves have both an outer and an inner component .

Accomplishment of something difficult brings pride. Even if it is only pounding spikes. Or painting a canvas .

The key is that doing something you like to do, either for the activity itself or for recognition, is a kind of play. The same task forced on you (especially repetitively) is a chore or boring job. We should avoid confusing the two .

Mankind evolved with hand coordination. In spite of our big brains, we remain a physically oriented species. I think AI art robs both the creator and the audience of that heritage. Except for the brief thrill of novelty, pride and satisfaction are completely missing .

Appreciation

I believe the primary goal of art is to instill appreciation. That is true whether one is creating it or absorbing it. All the rest is detail. That outlook applies to all types of artistry. Cooking, dancing, painting, whatever. A warm flush of “wellness” if it works. In current jargon, a re-enchantment with the world .

I approach my current pastels and sketches in such a mood. Not to “capture” what I see – that is done ad nauseum by photographs and photorealistic artists. Not to create salable artifacts, nor even some phantom dream of inclusion in the universal “museum without walls” . Just to fully engage in and appreciate a moment, in my case more easily accomplished by my clumsy actions.

Oh I admit it’s nice to have a tangible marker of having been alive. A kind of pride at having “done something” rather than just sitting on the couch. Like writing, a verifiable trail to the past .

Nice relaxed attitude, a child again. I don’t much care if what I do closely resembles whatever inspired me. The goal is more the trance of a vision enabled by concentrated action. When I wake out of this state, if successful, I am relaxed and content with everything .

Crude

I was raised in a fairly middling environment. Certainly not poverty nor even “salt of the Earth”, but not high end aristocratic. As I matured, I lost most ambitions of pretentiousness in my quotidian pleasures. I call it my crude peasant outlook .

For example, I enjoy a good steak. I do not go into purple prose ecstasy over exactly how wonderful it is – subtle flavors, tenderness, whatever. I find sauces and garnishes excessive. It’s just a good steak, another fine meal .

Most of the world I read about now seems to have passed me by. Pretentiousness reigns supreme. The “right things” are so much better. Handbags, salads, shoes, schools, cars, swimming pools … The internet sorts it all out for you to aid your expensive tastes .

I don’t pretend I like awful stuff. A dinner of peas and gruel is not enjoyable. Ratty clothes are terrible. But the level of relatively common, useful, and affordable stuff is quite high. And I try to appreciate it .

All in all, I find my crude peasant world a land of luxury and enchantment. I rarely envy all those others who mostly seem to scurry about hoping others will notice and envy them. That pretentiousness seems a terrible waste of our human gift of existence .

Fad Awareness

My wife has an amazing tendency to closely inspect only what she is interested in at the moment. It is honestly a trait most of us in this culture share. The forest is too huge, even the tree too complicated, so we examine each leaf as if it were the most important object in the environment .

That’s how our current “influencers” make money. Each proclaims the leaf they happen to be viewing as the most essential key to life. And lazy folks with no time for intellectual depth follow them for the sheer fun of it, like riding on an amusement park structure .

More unfortunately, religions and political movements have the same tendency. Seize on one or two narrow perspectives and defend them fiercely, ignoring forests, trees, and all the other leaves around them. Existence becomes tied to one or two holy objects. They compose essays, songs, poems, slogans. But beware if such gain power !

For most of us, as for my wife, it’s all a game of short-lived variety. A way to enhance each moment by becoming enchanted with the trivial .

But it’s no way to run a civilization .

Risk/Reward

Anyone can anecdotally give good reasons for never using an automobile. High on the list is a possibility of a deadly accident, examples of which abound. And yet, in this culture just about everyone uses a car all the time. Math has little to do with it. Nor do the horrible examples of mangled bodies. “Common sense” tells us that in spite of possible danger, it is far more useful to go places in a vehicle than to stay home. Unfortunately, such “common sense” is in short supply in other areas of our lives involving risk/reward .

Actually, anyone closely involved in a fatal accident either involving themselves or someone close to them wants to blame someone. The car manufacturer, road maintenance, whatever. And they rush about telling one and all about what must be done, maybe avoid cars at all cost .

That isn’t effective with stuff people are very familiar with. True “common sense” kicks in.

But in areas that are less well or less easily understood, anecdotes seem to rule. Medicines, laws, even right or wrong. Too esoteric to be easily understood. ” I know a man who …”, “I had a cousin who…”,” once I was …”.

All true. All irrelevant. When people try to make risk zero, as any entrepreneur can explain, reward vanishes .

Too Complicated

Our grandchild in fourth grade is being subjected to the “new math” curriculum. It is supposedly to encourage “curiosity about math”, and by implication the world .

I spent a little time teaching young children. In my opinion, the primary purpose of elementary school is socialization. Immersing children in the social mythology and tribal culture which they will grow into. That’s why I have always thought “homeschooling” was bad, because it missed that point and in many cases isolated kids from their future normality .

Learning at elementary levels should not be designed to “evoke curiosity”. Young humans are born curious. Nor are many children nor parents destined to become mathematicians. They simply want to use rote math facts and formulas in a complex world. No real need to “understand” why 2 + 2 = 4 – it just does! And that is useful at the grocery store .

Putting professional mathematicians – or professionals of any other academic subject – in charge of elementary curriculums was insane and wrong .

It is destroying what was once a noble pillar of our common culture.

Absolute

Real life is messy and full of contradictions. What feels bad might be good for you, what feels good might be bad. What works in one situation might not in the next. Rational people – whom we like to consider “sane” – understand this .

There seems to be a troubling trend, in times of complexity and change, for many people to drift towards absolutes. In an absolute frame of mind, there is no mess nor contradiction. A crystal clear vision separates everything into right and wrong, or some equivalent binary division .

Such a viewpoint does not allow for trade-off or risk/reward. It never deals in percentages nor probabilities. It does not allow for meaningful dialogue – all that can be discussed is how any other viewpoint is obviously wrong. The only mental movement must be toward whatever revealed “truth”.

It is of course comforting to join a cult of absolute believers. They can reinforce and magnify any belief so strongly that anything contrary – words, events, outcomes – cannot be accepted as “real.” Anything except the absolute is mistaken “lies”.

The internet is said to lead many down “rabbit holes”. At the bottom of each of these is some form of absolute. Sane people may deplore what is happening online. But unfortunately, sane people are in short supply and decreasing rapidly .

Conceit

“A sucker is born every minute” proclaimed PT Barnum. The “average American voter” has often been vilified for ignorance, prejudice, whatever. Frozen in collective memory by Menken’s “booboisie.”

And yet, we often found that speaking with each other one-on-one revealed a fairly complete interesting human being. Somehow we trusted that – informed by a free press – such good would shine through in the loneliness of the election booth. Mostly, it seemed to work .

But several generations of being assured that “you are just as good as anyone else” have had evil effects. Even in simple conversation, we discover everyone is as conceited as a god, certain that they know everything, sure that anyone claiming to be an expert (except the internet influencers they follow) is a charlatan.

So conceit has fallen on an entire population, certain that at any moment what they believe is true, fortified by warped electronic propaganda. No longer much fun to talk to. Anything but complete interesting human beings. Conceited know-it-alls, who unfortunately carry their very real ignorance and prejudices into the ballot box .

I used to agree that democracy was “the worst form of government except for everything else.” Now I tend to drop the qualifier .

Self Fulfilling

Long before anyone thought of “attractors” there was the concept of self-fulfilling prophecy. What you expect to happen (good or bad) happens, not because of fate but rather because you unconsciously work to make it happen .

These days we have an administration that glories in self-fulfillment. They decide cities are hell holes and work actively to make them so. They say people are unhealthy and act to make their idea come true. They decide most people are criminals and – lo and behold – “criminals” pop up everywhere .

Mostly they say we need a “glorious leader” to bring us out of a political malaise. Their desire for a dictator who makes the trains run on time is coming true even to the point of considering all American armed forces a feudal militia .

The trouble with self-fulfilling prophecy, of course, is that it is usually a distortion of reality. And by ignoring reality, the eventual decay and destruction is much worse than it should have been .

So, “attractor” as such attitudes may be, they leave me fondly wishing for the good old days when logical and informed leaders were willing to admit they weren’t quite sure what was best to do .