Tranquility

In our fortunate era, one can do many things, play many roles, in fact be different persons over time. We recognize standard stages of life – childhood, adolescence, young adult, middle-aged, senior, elder – and the various career changes one can make. But our very being can also transmute .

Tranquility is not a revered goal of our culture. It’s more important to be upset, to strive, to be unsatisfied with what is and work to change things for the better. For most of those stages of life, being tranquil is dangerously close to being a lazy good for nothing .

But elders _ well, little is expected at this declining energies and thoughts. Attempts by old folks to do great things is at best comical and at worst annoying and tragic. Tranquility fits those who otherwise get in the way of progress .

I confess to buying into this somewhat. Ever since I read  Innocents Abroad as a boy, I realized that younger people who accept life however awful it may be are more to be pitied than envied. I hardly ever sought tranquility, preferring even painful activity to doing nothing .

But now? I’m afraid I am still not quite tranquil, although I have slowed, appreciate the moments, and try not to regret all the many things I can no longer do. Such acceptance, I suppose, is close to tranquility. Or laziness, of course. 

Rule of Law

“Civilized” people like to look down on “primitives”. Among our other virtues, we live by rational “laws” while they have only childish “taboos” to guide actions and keep society working .

Laws are wonderful things, and a “rule of law” assures that we are all treated as fairly as possible. Our lawyers tell us so, and the authorities enforce their opinion. What a laugh it would be, they claim, to try to run a modern city with nothing but arbitrary taboos and foggy customs .

And yet . . . laws are rarely applied in personal life. There are few laws in a healthy family or friendship. There are still only “foggy” customs and basic taboos holding our relationships together. That is human. Even more formal organizations use mostly flexible “rules” and “guidelines” .

Laws try to be logical but are often too rigid to fit circumstance and must be “interpreted”. Lawyers love it. I am well aware you cannot at this moment run a modern society without law, but basing some future utopia on the perfection of its laws is madness .

“Rule of law” is of itself neither good nor evil. Like taboo, it all depends not only on the wording, but also on the application. We are all kind of primitive still .

Marriage

At various times, marriage has been defined as a dynastic continuation, wealth conservation, bourgeois tradition, social requirement, family obligation, or religious fraud. Not to mention modern twists and fantasies .

I’m sure anyone who tries to nail it down is excessively foolish. I will give it a comment anyway. I’ve been fortunate, and still consider our 50-year marriage the core of our lives. So a personal observation .

The main thing has always been trusted companionship, sealed with honest individual oaths. Those ideas of “for better or worse, in sickness and in health” have really meant something, sometimes a burden, more often a comfort. Got us through the inevitable rough patches.

We were fortunate to be well-formed individual people when we met. We did not have identical goals, we did not need to find our own meaning in each other. We were simply a pair who liked to share life and adventure – although still free not to do so all the time. Enough different interests to keep things interesting. And the ability to argue and resolve conflict. I admit that in all that the most important shared value was that of family. Raising children was a goal above all others .

Well – so much for this soapbox .

Cowboys and Indians

Little boys have always enjoyed, I suppose, playing war games of one side against another, often based on historic conflicts. In my youth it was Allies versus Nazis. In other places and times it could have been North versus South, Gauls versus Romans, or that constant favorite, cowboys versus Indians .

The games were usually harmless enough, anyone willing to take any side for an afternoon. Not at all like the real horrors of war. Kids didn’t much care about historic realism, and happily evoked stereotypes .

In real life, “cowboys versus Indians” had nothing to do with cowboys. It was the full military of an industrializing giant civilization pushing out a “primitive” culture. At best, it wanted to turn “Indians” into “white people.” At worst, it judged that impossible and tried to exterminate them or place them in isolated zoos .

In spite of modern romanticism, there was a lot purely awful and nasty about “native American” culture, as any honest reading of historic sources will quickly discover. And that lifestyle was fully incompatible with the onrushing pioneers.

There were no easy answers. And no solutions .

I fear the current Mideast is now turning into such a conflict. Only extermination or zoo preserves will be acceptable. A sad moment in a world not nearly so “enlightened” as we had hoped.

High Tide

Another “high tide advisory” has been issued. Sea levels are higher. Along the Northeast coast, where I’ve lived most of my life, the wide beaches are being swept away, towns on barrier Islands are facing destruction, coastal flooding is frequent. Although the rise has been incremental so far, melting glaciers could someday cause catastrophe .

Well, it’s one of many things I’ve seen change. Nasty weather patterns. Common insects, birds, animals vanishing. Open land privatized and restricted. Garbage and traffic and . . .  The list is immense. I have no real complaints. I’ve experienced almost all that I could in what was – for me – the best of all possible worlds. And I know each generation must face a different time. I may regret that the younger people will never enjoy what I did, but surely there will be other pleasures.

Some predict a variety of horrible apocalypses. Some predict a geoengineered, AI-directed paradise of long life and sybaritic existence. I reserve judgment. But surely some innocence and freedom has been lost.

Although helpless in the grander scenarios, there are still daily joys. A niche of parks, food, friends. Enveloped frequently by nostalgic memories. For the most part, I can ignore worries about my shortened future. Pay little attention to all the many things that seem to be going wrong. 

Including high tide .

Egomorphism

Anthropomorphism shapes everything into a kind of human, with feelings, desires, and powers similar to us. Not only “hard” nouns like trees, the sun, or buffalo, but also “concept” nouns like luck or evil. Many take it so far as to include imaginary ideas like family, government, or conspiracy.

I would coin an equivalent “egomorphism” for those who narrowly believe everything (including all other people) are exactly like them. They evaluate every part of the universe as if they were in control. Their desires, hopes, and fears become those of everyone and everything .

Unfortunately, it seems that such mentalities also see themselves as essentially rotten. They only survive by suppressing their inner worst tendencies. They assume that everyone else maliciously applies full power as they would do if they had no inhibitions .

That includes what is known as “projection” but it goes far beyond. It includes a basic hostility and paranoia as if fighting inner demons. It assigns agency to illusions such as conspiracies and secret societies all trying to destroy them .

A sad mental state for them .

A dangerous mental state to everyone else .